Magic Code in the Book of Changes

主：坤

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元，亨，利牝马之贞。 君子有攸往，先迷后得主，利西南得朋，东北丧朋。安贞，吉。

彖曰：
至哉坤元，万物资生，乃顺承天。坤厚载物，德合无疆。含弘光大，品物咸亨。牝马地类，行地无疆，柔顺利贞。 君子攸行，先迷失道，后顺得常。西南得朋，乃与类行；东北丧朋，乃终有庆。安贞之吉，应地无疆。

象曰：
地势坤，君子以厚德载物。

1. 若有所前往，要像坤那样有所遵循，不能倡先行动，而要跟着去做。
2. 自己带头会迷失方向道路，随后跟去做就能找到遵循的主使人，也就是找到可遵循的法则。
3. 西南有得到朋友的利益，东北有丧失朋友的利益，最终会有喜庆的利：得主的喜庆。
4. 西南属阴，同类相伴，有朋友，但属阴类，没有主心骨。东北属阳，失去同类朋友，却可得阳为主人。有利。

天体运动，大地顺应这种运动而变化，这就是地势顺。

君子要从大地受到启示，学习大地负载万物的精神，把大地的深厚变成自己道德修养上的深厚，以此去承担负载万物的责任。

六三：

含章可贞。 或从王事，无成有终。

象曰：

含章可贞；以时发也。 或从王事，知光大也。

1. 美德但不要显示，不显耀，是要待时而发。
2. 若跟随君王干大事业，会取得成就，但不能以功自居，这样才有好结果。
3. 要谦逊、内向，万不可张狂。充分注意这点就是吉。

六四：
括囊；无咎，无誉。

象曰：
括囊无咎，慎不害也。

1. 把口袋扎住口。要谨慎！守口如瓶，谨言慎行之意。
2. 韬光养晦，隐藏行迹和才能，不露锋芒，可保无咎无誉，平平安安。

复：小过

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亨，利贞，可小事，不可大事。飞鸟遗之音，不宜上宜下，大 吉。

彖曰：
小过，小者过而亨也。 过以利贞，与时行也。 柔得中，是以小事吉也。 刚失位而不中，是以不可大事也。 有飞鸟之象焉，有飞鸟遗之音，不宜上宜下，大吉；上逆而下顺也。

象曰：
山上有雷，小过；君子以行过乎恭，丧过乎哀，用过乎俭。

1. 小的方面能够通过。
2. 可以办小事，不可办大事。
3. 不宜往上，而适宜往下，往下大吉。是因向上是逆，向下是顺。顺才能获吉，逆不能获吉。
4. 行为上要超常一些：比一般谦恭更谦恭一点。往往常人在这些方面显得不足，不如给常人做榜样。

= ) OK....

A call for keeping Dhamma alive

The Buddha explained the eightfold Path so that people could develop it and realize the four noble Truths, the Truth of dukkha, unsatisfactoriness of all conditioned realities that arise and fall away; the Truth of the origination of dukkha that is clinging; the truth of the cessation of dukkha that is nibbāna; the Truth of the Path leading to the cessation of dukkha, that is the eightfold path.

When there isn't anybody who can clearly explain the right practice, the development of the eightfold Path, people cannot develop it and they cannot realize the four noble Truths. When nobody in this world can penetrate the four noble Truths anymore, the world will be dark. The Dhamma will gradually disappear.


Acharn Sujin said:


The teachings are almost dying, let us develop right understanding. We do not have to feel depressed when thinking of the disappearance of the teachings. On the contrary, we should have courage and cheerfulness to begin again and again developing right understanding.

Inspired x2

"Try to become like householder Citta... and householder Hatthaka of Alavi... These two, Citta and Hatthaka of Alavi, are models and guiding standards for my lay disciples."

"If you decide to be a monk... try to be like Sariputta and... Maha Moggallana... These two, Sariputta and Maha Mogallana, are models and guiding standards for my Bhikkus."

(SN 17.23)

I am confused, although deeply inspired by Yu song's talk that afternoon. Other than that, I'm unsure whether will I fall into my defilements of greed? He is really good, if he's enlightened, I'll certainly be even more convinced and willing to follow. (So... Yu song, please... lolz) I am lack of an example of a person who I wanted to be, for me to model upon.

After all the calling, I felt so tired, as if all brain cells worked Overtime, and go no energy to think, "If what I am doing now need improvement, what should I do, which direction should I procceed and how?" So I just give myself a break, "Just sleep first."

Later, when I woke up, went to look up for the great lay disciples of the Buddha and I saw this:

"Try to become like householder Citta... and householder Hatthaka of Alavi... These two, Citta and Hatthaka of Alavi, are models and guiding standards for my lay disciples."

"If you decide to be a monk... try to be like Sariputta and... Maha Moggallana... These two, Sariputta and Maha Mogallana, are models and guiding standards for my lay Bhikkus."

Out of curiousity and excitment, that "Finally, a way is pointed out. No need to use my brains le..." I read up about Citta and Hatthaka of Alavi.

Inspired!!! "So this is what the Buddha expected for his Lay disciples to be." Not only they are successful in life, one has gain the 3rd fruition and the other has gained the 2nd fruition, both destined to be Arahants in the future.

I shall model myself upon the great lay disciples of the Buddha, Citta and Hatthaka, just like them, Successful in their lives, not fall away from the Dhamma and experiencing happiness of peace within. = )

If I decided to ordain, I shall learn to be Maha Mogallana and Sariputta. But before that, let me be a successful man. = )

Untie a knot

I'm stuck, so I get it untied.
I wonder was it fully untied,
But I know it has losen.

Yu song's learnings do help me alot. I think, I summarized the overall into this 3 points:
1. Know what you wanted
2. Know what you need to do
3. Make it a MUST, Commitment.

To achieve or resolve:
1. What? (What you want? (Goal) /what's the problem?)
2. Why? (Why? (Motivational factor) / What's the cause of the problem?)
3. How? (What can be done? (Action) )

Currently, I see why we fail because we didn't make it a MUST. I see commitment lacking when there is no MUST.

He futured emphasized on doing massive small actions. I guess the logic behind is, there is no one step to the goal. Accumulation of what is needed is required, no doubt, failures as well.

It help me see things out of the scope we are touching as well.
I see that actually I like to keep things all in my mind, all the plans are up there, and this is a problem. I became the only person to know my own ideas and it is almost impossible for others to comprehend. I see the importance of organising our thoughts, the idea by means of writing and drawing. Through writing, we comfirm the thought, and it is much easier for other's to comprehend.

7 factors to be a successful person:

1. Know the goal
2. Know the way to the goal
3. Know yourself
4. Know the timing
5. Know the amount (Moderation)
6. Know the gathering
7. Know the individuals

I have faith in what the Buddha said, but subconsciously I was not convinced, i believe, thats why I didn't keep up to this 7 points strictly. What if, I make it a MUST? = )

And the 4 bases of success: Desire, effort, will, investigative knowledge...

A feast at home =) ...Today's lunch....

Hehehe.... Da Bao from a Dim sum restaurant at west mall by my aunty... = )

My father had got me a proper digital camera finally. I choose de leh!

Shun Bian test camera. Not bad ah the quality...

...A good tool to keep memories too, if one day I've lost all my memories....which I might

I gave up my work...

Today, I gave up my architecture presentation. I was so upset about my work. If I were to submit this work, it would be just something like the 3 piece of paper, the worse I've ever done.
I think I'm wasting the lecturers time, there is nothing to comment, nothing to see, why not just don't submit, don't waste time.

I'm just so remorseful and depressed about my performance throughout poly in my academics. I have my expectations, but why can't I meet it? I don't lack the ability.

Jon had tell me about my priority problem, time management problem. I didn't struggle hard enough to overcome it. Now I see my problem is with the time. I'm trying doing too many things in too little time, but i didn't realise it. I was always thinking, how much time I had left, and how much I can complete, the whole plan is in the mind. But in reality, my speeds turn out to be far more slower than what was planned in mind. I got to reduce greatly, what I have on my hands. I wonder am I able to do it.

I had my stuffs up here, in my mind. But without sufficent drawings and models, I can't present it, nobody will understand what I'm talking. But I just felt so bad, that I didn't want to submit, I can't do it. Not because I've given up myself, but I just can't face people with such poor quality work, furthurmore, the lecturers which had not been giving up on me. There is a pyscological barrier I can't overcome. I just can't face my lecturers, and the work is making me very demoralised.

After I decided not to submit, I lied on my bed and think. Should I quit school and stop wasting money? What can I do after quiting poly? I've thought of going back to DP Architects to learn and train my skills, and I'll see if I can procceed to University level straight with work experience.

But later I thought, will people accept you? A o level student, plus poly drop out?

I think the most dissapointing part is, I know what I want, where I am, but I fail to diaplay all my levels. I am not aiming for A or what, just to perform my optimum standards.

I talked to Yusong first. and he asked me to admit the failure, send a email to the lecturers on this, and aim not to repeat it again. So, from the low mode, I was returning to the normal mode.

Later I talked to Yan ching... den kanna scolding. But I feel better, more light.

Now, so what about having too much priorities? I dunno how to put them down. Rather I can't. For who I am now, my conscience are telling me that I can't neglect other just like that, for my selfish reasons. But, it is also stressing me about my unfulfilling work performance that I showed to my lecturers. It even amplifies each time I remember, that they never gave me up, regardless how poorly I performed. But this time round, I just feel too remorseful, too shameful to show my work, even my face.

But this is not the end, I'll work out all I haven't work out, using the time I have now, since I do not need to present. No grades, doesn't really matter. It matters more that my design is out, and I can see and appreciate what I've come out with, and open it out for comments and improvements.

I can't cheat myself, when I have no design, but say I have design and all the stories behind it. Maybe that's why i am slow, cos every part must have reasons and it's purpose. Not 4 walls and a roof, that's it. It must be at least though thorough and logical in placing.

It also attacks my pride alot. Since secondary school, I am not just a student who slack around and study unwillingly. Once a favourite student, but now? Me and my lousy work, always giving poor results. I just want to do it well, that is something I like too...

Let me give myself one last chance, to make and end with all this rubbish. May I be successful.

原谅。。。会原谅吗?

原谅

词: 黄宏焱 曲: 黄宏焱

人与人之间的聚散 在于你我宽容的限量
只要大家互相设身处地去想一想
生活本来就是这样 有着许许多多的悲凉
因为人们不知如何去原谅
何苦纠缠于一时之见 是非交错
只有嗔恨激起 坠入无知的网

Chorus:
抛开沉重的自我 增进慈心的培养
学习如何发出爱的光芒
未来的路还漫长
更要学习多原谅
和气景象 操控在你手上

By Buddhist Hymn group/ Sunny Rain
*********************************


佛陀说，世上有两种愚人。
不当自己的错误为一个错误的人，那些不肯原谅已经认错的人。

原谅就是放下心中的不满、怨恨。
愿众生能够快乐，希望众生远离痛苦，
为他们所拥有的好感到开心。
但众生还是自己所有行为的主人，
他们仍然要接受由自己行为而带来的一切后果。
这既是慈心、悲心、随喜心、平等心。

原谅必须学习，培养。
我们渴望被原谅，所以更应该原谅他人。
对于他人的过错要学会去原谅。
但对于自己的过失要感到惭愧，而非内疚，做出不必要的自责及自我心理折磨。
佛说，为有惭和愧能将人从过失中解救出来。（Hiri-Otappa）
惭是，对恶行感到厌恶（wu4）
它使人对作恶事感到羞耻，产生退避各种恶行的想象。学会尊重自己。
愧是，对行恶感到害怕
它使人害怕去做恶事，产生退避各种恶行的想象。学会尊重他人。

只有对自己的过错感到惭愧，才有办法改进。所以佛说，这样的人有智慧。
怨恨只是自我折磨的傻事，毫无益处，更何况去怨恨有惭愧心的智者。所以，佛说原谅有惭愧心的人，已经认错的人。这样的人有智慧。

原谅他人，也原谅自己。被原谅的你，要原谅自己。不愿认错改过就是自讨没趣，自造苦恼，自己跟自己过不去，这算原谅自己吗？改变自己的行为才是原谅自己。

但很可惜，可以承认自己的错误为一个错误的智者，蛮少的。所以无奈的看着众生，互相折磨。

我与红尘

有些人以为，我是一个古人。为什么呢？因为我似乎不看电视，不听音乐，好像每天念经打坐而以。那真是大错特错啊！可能。。。或许。。。其实。。。我很少，或者从来没有和别人说这些东西吧，好像我最爱的音乐，最新好听的歌曲，喜欢的歌手，或者谈谈连续剧的剧情，Anime?

可能我认为，没有必要聊这些东西。通常我会和朋友讨论分享(discuss and share)对某某电影、戏或者音乐的意见和心得(personal views and what I've learnt)。

对于音乐，除了游戏的音乐，戏剧的主题曲、插曲等。。。在这几年来，我认识了一些我认为有水准并且和我口味的，例如：周杰伦，S.H.E，林俊杰。太杂的音乐，我不喜欢。所以我没有特定的偶像，而且我不会去追星，只要什么作品好，合味道，我就去欣赏。

我认为，歌曲的词和曲必须互相协调衬托，而非词是词、曲是曲，二者没有心灵感应。怎么说？就如一些歌曲，音乐的气氛和感觉，和所填的词的意境不配。比如，开心的音乐配感伤的词。

碰巧，这个看法和古人对“南音”的要求类似。如果认为传统音乐不好听的话，第一、可能不够刺激，不适合。或者第二、品味低俗，不会欣赏。我推崇台湾“汉唐乐府”的作品，《梨花园》。传统唐代宫廷的南音唱法，配合古代的步伐，婀娜多姿，十分诗意。我和dickson看了在新加坡的演出都赞不绝口。如果比较，在唱戏的艺人和现代的戏剧电影相比，称他们为“仙女”，当之无愧，因为太美了。

现代的好歌我认为大多是周杰伦和方文山合作。例如，候鸟，我认为是绝品。送给S.H.E 了，但是没有白送。哈哈。

我看我唯一喜欢的英文歌是Hong Zhi 以前和我分享的"Photograph" by Nickelback.

我最喜欢的周杰伦作品是《枫》、《千里之外》、《东风破》、《回到过去》、《发如雪》、《霍元甲》、《反方向的钟》、《爱在西元前》、《断了的弦》、《上海1943》、《园游会》、《止战之殇》、《本草纲目》、《外婆》、《蓝色风暴》、《四面楚歌》。

还有S.H.E. 的 《候鸟》、《白色恋歌》、《触电》、《热带雨林》、《花都开好了》、《中国话》、《五月天》。其实我的ring tone 一直都是《候鸟》的Chorus 啊~ LOL...

还有很多其他歌手的歌曲。。。如阿桑的《叶子》等，但不能一一举出，太多了。

音乐和香味变成我的记忆留言簿。搁放很久的音乐，在拿出来听，会让我想起很多过去的回忆和往事。那刻听的音乐，会储存那刻的人与事。香味也是一样。可能是头发的香味、身上的香味或者不同的檀香、沉香的味道。

戏呢？除了电视剧、电影，我还看音乐剧。目前最让我回味的连续剧是最近的《汉武大帝》、《秦始皇》和《大长今》。电影有非常旧的《秦颂》、《女人四十》、《嘛嘛烦烦》、《太极张三丰》、黄飞鸿系列，最近的有《英雄》、《黄金甲》、《小孩不笨2》、《跑吧孩子》、《Just Follow Law》、 《功夫》、 《少林足球》。音乐剧只有陈洁宜为主角的 和 汉唐乐府的《梨花园》。

看戏，对我来说不是看人或演员，也不只是剧情，也是背后的意思、意义，作者可能想要表达的内容，还有我从中所明白，体会，学习到的或者和我想法一样的。有些则是因为喜欢，向功夫片、僵尸片。= )

我看 anime 吗？看！ Doraemon... 乱马1/2... 蜡笔小新... 樱桃小丸子... 晴天小猪... 忍着乱太郎... 龙猫 还有些不懂名字的。库洛魔法使(Cardcaptor Sakura)，魔幻游戏(Fushigi Yuugi) and the recently replayed at midnight, 青出于蓝(Aiyoriaoshi), One Piece and 千与千寻(Spirited Away).

我最喜欢的是魔幻游戏,又称“不思议游戏”(Fushigi Yuugi)。但只看了一半。记得当时在Dorma 工厂做工。每天在6.00am要赶上Bus98。当时就播这个anime，one piece 和一个机器人的anime, 类似以前的机器人警察的Anime。我被Fushigi Yuugi的剧情内容感动、吸引着。所以每天工作都很期待在巴士上看。那就是我在做工时的唯一享受。为了存钱到中国练武、我几乎接下所有可以OT的机会，包括周末。每天6.00am起床，9.00pm到家。到家后必须睡觉，应为明天5.30就要起床。到了接近五月，剩下在工厂工作的3个星期，我连续两个星期，一到七工作，结果发烧，退了由来。结果最后星期做不到几天工。

Fushigi Yuugi 吸引我的也是里面的中国色彩。故事简述这一名少女在图书馆里阅读了四神天书，结果进入那个世界，成为召唤古代天文的神兽朱雀的巫女。如果没错，在古代天文学把天分为四分，命名为青龙(Dragon)、白虎(Tiger)、朱雀(Phoenix)、玄武(Turtle+Snake)。

虽然喜欢某些音乐，某些剧情，但是不狂追，不沉迷。我尽量的从中学习、欣赏。通常能够吸引到我的，通常是有内涵，有意义的东西，包括人。如果有些人，只会说没有意义的东西，态度很没有内涵，没有正确思想和道德的人，我会不太能和他有亲密的谈话、也不太喜欢和他们说话。

往往这些人都是，一事无成，得过且过，想法幼稚，没有思想的人。可能有愿望与梦，但除了做梦，他不会认真的去实现梦想。有些就会，怨天尤人，怪命不好，其实很多的悲哀下场都是自己做来的。唉~ 讲也未必有用，非常耗精神。

有些人沉迷在这个花花世界，生活在幻想之中。活在自己编的剧情，自己自创的角色，他会去想这些角色的想法，看法，然后以自己以为的看法去行动。有些通过音乐、剧情，来激起自己想要得感觉，甚至悲伤心情。沉迷在自己“浪漫”，“悲伤”的爱情世界。这些真是可悲、可怜的人。


快乐一直活着

往往认为自己活着的人，不知道如何去活。
在过去和未来徘徊的你，
要如何在真实的当下，找到您所要的快乐？

一个自称已经找到的人，
他告诉我：

快乐就在你心里，你要去哪里？
为了填补心中的空洞，到处奔走。
往往越找、越追，离快乐更远。

你寻找快乐，可是却不知道什么是快乐。
其实就是一棵满满的心。
满了，够了，真的不再需要什么了。
应为它不需要其它的，所以它会满。
这就是快乐。

你可以独自一人，一无所有，
但满满的心不会离你而去。
你找到真正的快乐了。
是一棵饱满，安稳的心。
无忧、无虑、无所要求。

我也是听说这是快乐，
但还未找到它。
可是，在逐渐醒来的当中，
我发现了它的痕迹。

当你发现自己须要的越来越少，
其实应为你越来越接近快乐。

- 鑫豪

I am suffering... is it?

I saw many people misunderstood the first noble truth of Buddhism, taking it as "Life is suffering" or "I am suffering". They thought Buddha say we are suffering. So, this misunderstanding made people feel that Buddhism is pessimistic.

The Buddha only taught 2 things, "Suffering and the way to it's cessation", he said. It is about the path to happiness actually as it is the way to end suffering. But before we can solve a problem, we need to identify the problem, it's cause and by removing the cause, we solve the problem. Thus firstly, Buddha said, "There is suffering" and he further elaborate what is it. Next he say the "Cause of suffering", then "The Ceassation of suffering", and finally, "The way to the ceassation of Suffering".

Life is not suffering, neither it is filled with suffering...
The truth is the existence of suffering...

And the cause of suffering in it's very root is craving, not anyone else. See it deeply as it is more than superfical. Many see the 4 noble truth as basic, or hinayana. But those who really understands, or who are on the way seeing even the first noble truth only, it is actually something really deep. Those who can comprehend this truths fully has gained enlightenment le.

The Buddha himself gained enlightenment through the 4 noble truths, a fact which many did not realise. Similarly for arahants and Pacceka Buddhas, so I don't see anything 'small' or 'lesser' here.

Last day of Competition

So, training is important. It's a beautiful display of my 枪 but same problem, many 失误。Jiao lian say I didn't manage to display my standards, but I displayed the ability of "on the spot" reaction. I wonder should I go on for the next year competition? = ) Maybe.

Grand ending, some displayed very well, but they didn't get what they deserved. But anyway, some got Gold, some silver and some bronze... haha... Hail to my team! 2nd for group achievement award in terms of gold and silver.

So later we went for a dinner together. It was such a big group that we need to take up 4 big tables. I was seating with Zhi yuan and Bao chun, Hu jiao lian, joyce and the rest of the adults. The kids sat together and have their fun with food. I think I feel comfortable and more sensible to seat with the adults. Their topics was more suitable for my type than playing "终极密码" den messing up the fish for forfeit.

Hu jiao lian gave a good talk about wushu. He mentioned that we should go beyond singapore competition. If we desire, we can go china. Everyone was like...Huh?! China...isn't that sure lose. He say in china, there are people who are lousy also, so don't worry. Some are even worse than us.He was talking about a point that, the identity of your oponent is not important. Regardless he or she is a nation team player or not, if you have the skills, means you have it and just show it. No big deal about being a national team player. If we have the standards, we can win them. If they press down our marks, so be it, but at least they are ashamed, said Hu Jiao lian. But we cannot deny, there are real good players in our national team they deserve their awards. But regarding pressing marks, we are use to it already la. Hu jiao lian also said, if you go on the competition, we should have the mind set of being ready to get something.

I think, if anyone were to judge a person's skill and talents by seeing the score, than he don't know wushu. He should look at the skill of the person as it is actually is. A person can get high marks without having gotten his basics right enough. Most likely, it's nice to see, stable and got atmosphere, you get all the high marks...

So conclusion, this time round I didn't got anything. Should I train for the next? Got people say blah blah thats why I lose... I was thinking, when I was getting my awards, you are still having difficulties with your 马步弓步。 Not performing well and no standard is 2 different thing. Maybe I'm more clearer about why I didn't perform well enough, and not my standards.

But the person who say me in the end also didn't get anything, so I thought, aiyah, nevermind la, still can be friends, even he say me ah, I should not take this opportunity to "suan" him for revenge of his insult. LOLz... but frankly speaking, its an insult to me by saying me no standard, a loser... you suck etc, but he don't see it that wat bah.

If a person wants to learn, he should be humble and respectful. Or else, people will not be inclined to teach him anything. “三人行，必有吾师。” Certainly we have something to learn from each other in some way. You may know that little bit, but people might know more. So be careful when pointing the flaws of others.

The opponents are quite polite and humble to each other, we didn't boast around or mock at others. We just play our routine and get our points. Some of the people know me, I know them, but we never talked to each other before, only smile, nod head. we just saw each other before you see... =) Alot of people know me, but I dunno them. Most probably my appearance caught people's attention and easy to remember.

But alot of people I know off, are nice people and they are handsome people of good Kamma. And I'm glad they accepted me as their friend. But after 20 years, since I'm born, I still mind about how I look. Mirror to me is a stranger. I never looked into the mirror when I was young, or anything reflective. I don't like to see myself in photographs too. At least now it's better. But I still seldom looked into the mirror unless necessary, but I never looked into a mirror with another person beside me. It's something too subtle to be noticed by people.

I always had that feeling and thinking that, "Isn't it better if I look good too? At least I wouldn't be an eyesore out of the group of handsome and pretty friends. More fit to be together." Just out of place, sometime I feel. Being with these people is a luxury to me, and i had different groups of friends like that. That's what I thought when we were celebrating and having dinner with the wushu friends too.

I have that worry, will I be jobless because of my looks? Will I have real good friends? Will the judges give me lower marks because of my looks?... my father use to say that I am a step behind people because of my looks. I got to work harder. I find it true in someway. If I had looked better, my wushu would have been more 顺眼 and more nice isn't it.

Self confidence? I only have confidence in my talents and ability only. I'm grateful when people are talking to me, but its a big thing when I was left alone or left invisible by people who I know. Normal people just can't understand why is it like that. I'm just a person with alot of weakness hidden. I wonder will there be anyone who can understand the "Me" behing my face and expressions, knowing that, behind that smile hides bitterness sometimes.

So much has been through today, and I got another summary:

"A friend who really knows me, is the one who does the right thing and say the right words to me, at the right moment, which is hard to meet, which can't be found. He got to really understand my character and he doesn't need to learn it."

-Xinhao

1st Day of Competition

This is my most lonely competition day. Just abit different, because last time we use to move in a group to the competition place by a school bus. Hmm... I went to a Taoist temple first.

It's not a Buddhist practise, but I do so as a Chinese. =) There are existence of deities, even Buddhism does not deny this fact.

I was Kaypo about what will happen later, so I went to "求签". Need skill de ok... Alot of people dunno how. I was brought up in a environment that I can learn both Taoism and Buddhism since young... But, it only gives you advise, but alot of things is actually understood, like what the Taoist says, "我命在我，不属天地。(" My life belongs to me, not the heaven and earth.) We do the cause and receive the results, nothing is fated.


Regarding 求签，it works if you know how. But it only tells you a prediction, but most likely you can't change anything much. Sometimes, you are in it but too late to react. So, knowing the future not equal to changing the future. But it can help to avoid some wrong moves, like once I had before. I learned 易经占卜, out of curiosity，not very skilled in it, but it never fail before, unless I misinterpret it. It gives advises, but still depend on whether you are working on it or not. In English, it is called 'the book of changes', telling your current situation, what should you do, and extra info about the future, which is dependent on your present. Quite a detail advise, but still all up to man's hardwork and effort to prefect and strive in the right way.

"We are the owner of our action... for one who avoids evil, everyday for him is a holy day, a lucky day." = ) Knowing the works of cause and effect is better tha knowing the future in someway. Make the changes now. (Ya. know how to say, but don't know how to do.)

Back to competition, I knew it wouldn't be good, cause I didn't practise well mah, But maybe sometimes got miracle leh? = ) hehe. So I went to Tong Whye temple(通淮庙), the main deity for the temple is 关圣帝君（关公). The gods had been quite good to me, their advises are accurate, and gave me many guidance. They don't grant me anything, I was trained to work things out by my own effort. I was fortunate to meet good teachers and people, who mould me in the good way.

So, I got the 5th saying:

吕蒙正守困 (中平)

子有三般不自由，门庭萧索冷如秋。

若逢牛鼠交承日，万事回春不用忧。

Summarised by the 道士（Priest）: Today is not beneficial for me. It's just not my day. The probability of winning is low.

The 道士 is kind, he told me, nevermind, if win, good lah, if not, nevermind, 在努力咯。and he keep telling me, 百尺竿头, 继续努力。。。old people like to repeat, but it is meaningful. I think the 签 tells him alot about will be happening to me, and what has happened to me, but he only tell me portions of what he knows.... ZZZZ...

For people who don't know: 百尺竿头

百尺竿头：

很高的竿子的顶端。佛教比喻修行造诣达到极高境地。比喻不能满足已有的成绩，要一次又一次地继续努力。

Ok, so it's really not my day. Along my routine, for both 长拳 and 剑术, I have many many 失误。Cannot stand firm lah, hand touch ground lah. Hai~ 练不够啦~! When I was rehearsing outside the stadium, it's still ok... But things just crop up when I was in the competition. I wasn't nervous ok... hai..


The most funny thing is my scores are extremely low. I think people who saw the video of my competition, compare to those not so good one, I at least deserve a better mark rite? But, anyway, people have eyes, so just be it bah. Even aunty florence also say, "Your sword play is really beautiful, you are there actually. Your 旋子is very nice." Aiyah, but I 失误 mah.


It's really a lonely day. Nobody really cheer for me, unlike in the past. Even my Jiao lians left before my last event. Maybe it's too late le. But aunty florence stayed to supported me. My last event is at evening. Just nice, I'm the last for all the routine I'm taking part.


There are some who are very happy when I lost... that means I'm really that hard to deal with lo. =) Thanks for giving my standards some recognition haha. I think I'm abit like wesley, got skill within, got standard within, just not 争气 enough to show it to people. There are people who think why I can coach people even, to them I'm not as good compared to them. Because I know how to coach mah, and I know the requirements, standards and technique.


When I saw my 长拳 video, other than some 失误 and lack of speed，my moves is accurate. But I got a lower mark than people who have stamina and speed but not accurate moves, and even lower than people who don't have both...

So.. tomorrow is my last competition, 枪术。But, not going for 求签 again， my 枪 routine even not firm...LOL... So, most likely also won't turn out too good. Just try my best.

But I think, I really need to focus to be successful for anything, which means, I can't involve in too many things, or maybe, too much for my to balance le. Like, ven Jinadatta said, "Do one thing at a time. If you do 2 things at a time, you fail both... You can only produce good work if you focus."

Another thing I thought of when I was on my way back. The mind was neutral, awhile happy, awhile feeling empty. Then I thought again, the Buddha was from the warrior caste, so he is also skilled in martial arts, and he was the best la. Because he has mastery in the four bases of success, so he would succeed in whatever he desire, for things possible. But, he got all the success and fame, wealth and health, but seeing these as impermanent, subject to change, unable to escape from illness aging and death, which brings all such mundane happiness away. He choose to forgo all mundane and material gains and seek for the spiritual path, the way to the end of suffering, the way to true happiness. Does this part of his life story telling us something?

The life of the Buddha embedded many teachings and opinions about the idea of Buddhism and his doctrine, but many just missed the points.

Reflecting back on how people see each other, their attitude, my attitude, the exhibition and everything today, I had a shallow summary in mind:

"In the mist of ignorance and their deluded eyes,
man failed to see the saints around them."

Xinhao
= )

1 DAY COUNTDOWN...倒数一天！

第一次比赛。。。
我哭了。。。（失误）

第二次、第三次。。。
我赢了。。。铜和银。。。

这次。。 会怎么样呢？

一切已经来不及了，三个字“练不够”。

现在才体会到，原来胜败不是比赛的全部。最令人遗憾的是对不起自己，没能把实力完全发挥。既使每得奖，至少对得起自己啊，实力都发挥了！哎呀，可是就是我没有在报名比赛前训练。。。报名后才训练。而且之前停了很久很久。今天最后一天的练习，薏慧看到我那么久没有练，还可以做一个旋风腿接劈叉，都吓一跳。可想而知，我停很久了。体力都追不上了。心里知道，就是身体不配合。“心到，力不到啊”。真可谓实实在在的：“心有余而力不足”啊！

志远还来问我枪的问题，哎哟，我说啊，不要问我啦，我现在那里有资格为你们讲动作呢。他还说要学习我的“顺”。我就告诉他，我现在的动作最好不要看，不够好看别人的吧。有些叫我“何教练。。。何教练。。。”叫到我好尴尬。

这次的比赛，好像是买一个教训一样。我还担心，如果打得太差，担心会丢教练的脸哦！
不指望奇迹，只希望不要打得太遭，不要出差错就OK了。平平安安打下来。=）

拜六两场，长拳、剑术。拜天一场枪术。

如果命中自有定数，对手全部功夫不到家，金牌、银牌是不会跑掉的。

对我自己说：“加油”！！

2 days before my competition day

Finally, got the moves right. The 穿枪、抛枪 while running..and etc. But time seems to be pressing me very hard. My Architecture submission is Next week...wha... lolz...

This time round abit nervous, cause I'm not well-prepared enough. There are too much uncertainty. My moves are not stable enough...meaning didn't practise enough.

Now I got one more day to train up and my 空翻 not settled. But abit quite miraculous la, I master the moves quite quickly... 3 days? Around there. I just need more practise to firm up.

It was lucky my basics was there, and it's just that my physical strength still abit pulling my standards back.

I've thought of quiting the competition, as the skills, time and project is pressing me, and some misc stuffs. But I thought I should rather lose in the competition than to retreat. But I just don't want to throw my Jiao lian's face...

The funny thing was, last time I got a bronze for nan dao in the inter-school competition but I got a silver for national comp. That nan dao I practise for a few months only. Now It's another time to see whether I can create more miracles.

Will and effort plays a big role. It is fair enough if I lose, cause I didn't practise as much as others. But I should do whatever possible now and I believe I can do it. The wushu friends is being very supportive = ), and I happy that they point out my mistakes, the irony is, these people are people who I've taught last time.

At first I find it funny, why these people like to pin point my faults? Did I teach too much, they want to get a thrill by teaching me back. But later it turns out to me that they want me to perform well also = ) . There are some who wanted to beat me, but I'm alright with it if you have the ability. Losing and winning is just something like that.

I was taught to go beyond winning and losing. Like, I always like to repeat, winning is not about winning others, but ourselves. It is only through overcoming ourselves we improve and excel. You might had won a competition, something very superfical, but lost to your pride and ego.

This is what I've been thinking today.